If you’re in my IG community (or real-life community) – you may already know that this hasn’t been the easiest season in my personal life.
The wonderful professional/business wins of 2021, 2022, and now 2023 have coexisted with infertility.
I’d like to share what I’ve learned through this journey (so far). If this isn’t your jam, no worries. It’s a loaded subject. It can be triggering. It’s not super relatable unless you’ve been through it. But I’ve learned that MANY women (humans) struggle with fertility issues in silence and I’m committed to sharing my story, in hopes that it will make anyone also going through this feel less alone.
Our story looks similar to many couples (yes, even couples in our barely-30-years-old age group). We started trying to conceive in early 2021, figuring that it would be a breeze. Our parents got pregnant in the blink of an eye. Our friends were churning out pregnancy announcements like it was no big deal. I’d spent a good portion of my adult years trying NOT to get pregnant. So, I figured “how hard can it be?”
Fast forward to early 2022 and… nada. Not a baby in sight. A LOT of wasted pregnancy tests, tears in the bathroom, diets, exercise plans, and zero hot-tubbing or baths for my hot-water-loving husband.
We were finally accepted to our local fertility clinic in June 2022. Tests upon tests uncovered that I have low AMH levels (ovarian reserve) and zero ovarian function on my right side due to a cyst the size of a grapefruit (I kid you not). It was recommended that we start IVF sooner rather than later, to maximize our chances of having multiple successful pregnancies (we would love to have two + kids).
In September of 2022, we received the go-ahead to start IVF, after confirming that the aforementioned grapefruit is highly unlikely to be cancerous. A pre-cycle blood test changed the plan entirely…
I found out I was 7 – 8 weeks pregnant. The light period I had a few weeks prior was implantation bleeding.
Andrew and I celebrated, googled like crazy, and started making plans to tell our families at Thanksgiving.
But, three days later, I started bleeding. I went to the hospital with the worst bloating I had ever felt in my life. Entirely on my left side. It turns out the pregnancy was ectopic. The little embryo was growing in my left fallopian tube, instead of in my uterus. It wouldn’t be a viable pregnancy.
I was given methotrexate to stop the growth of the embryo and sent home. Five days later I was back in the ER because the drugs hadn’t worked in time and my fallopian tube ruptured. The gynecologist on call did emergency surgery and that was that.
September, October, and November were marked with grief, trying to find a way back to normalcy, all kinds of healing modalities, and waiting for the go-ahead to begin IVF.
We started our first egg retrieval cycle in the second week of January 2023. The surgery was just a few days ago and we are now waiting for daily updates about the progress of our little embryos.
This is likely only part one of our story. Part two will come later!
If you’ve been through this or if you’re also struggling with infertility – please say hello. Send me a dm on Instagram. I’d love to connect and hear your story.
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My Infertility Story
January 23, 2023